I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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