i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
This house was built for laser tag.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
