So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
Randomize
