Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
You can't just leave with hair like that
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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