i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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