Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
