Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Buhtt sex?
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
