Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
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