Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize