i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
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