there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
