Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Randomize
