My first STD was from a foam party
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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