how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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