The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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