she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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