im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Randomize
