I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize
