turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
