And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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