they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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