so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
Everclear isn't food dammit
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
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