So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
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