Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
