White coat. Heels.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
