Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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