it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize
