Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
