He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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