He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
I'm passing your future prison.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Randomize
