You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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