I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
