Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
