so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
