Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
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