no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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