im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
