Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
