Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
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