Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
Randomize
