Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Randomize
