i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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