Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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