it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
