I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Randomize
