a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
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