someone threw a dead crab at me
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Randomize