whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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