"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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