Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
