Tip for today: never try to fart and swallow at the same time. You'll end up choking on whatever you are currently swallowing and shit yourself from the freakout of choking.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Randomize